Lately Brian has been feeling overwhelmed and has protested silently yet somewhat angrily against random people or events. I wish I could make it all better for him. Bring him into my arms and provide the calm his mind needs. Unfortunately, it;s not something I can do unless he allows me to at least give it a try.
I’ve been feeling tired lately, new job, earlier hours, longer drive – stuck in traffic – and I feel overwhelmed with all the things Brian and I have to do. Overwhelmed to the point where I’ve started to pretend the tasks are not there for us to do.
We have so many things to do in the next few days and so little time to accomplish them!
Mom & Dad, along with uncle and family are coming over to celebrate Thanksgiving on Friday with us. I’m stressing out because the house is a mess (We really haven’t finished putting things in order after the wedding) Brian is stressing out because there is so much to cook for both days, specially for Friday! and because we have so many things lingering, undone, untouched, unfinished, unattended and I don’t know how to make it better for him because I’m not even sure where to start.
I am a procrastinator. And I grew up believing it’s alright to act that way. Things are not there unless you want to acknowledge them. So being that I’m ignoring this chaos, it’s not really there. Yeah-yeah. I know what you’re thinking. It doesn’t make it go away. It only emphasizes my lunacy.
Anyway. Little by little and perhaps in an unnoticed manner, I procure that we get things done. It may not even be perceptible to the naked eye, but I make an effort to complete the tasks we have pending. There are so many small things undone around the house that it makes it seem like we really neglect our routinely tasks.
I do have certain guilt about my productivity sprees, where I want to accomplish it all in one day because I haven’t done it in one week or in one month, because although I become very active and get several things done, I get frustrated because we don’t get them all. And then I make it seem like we really got nothing done when we finally put some time into it. And I apologize love, for making it seem like I don’t notice your hard work sometimes, but believe me I do. It’s only that you have a crazy wife who acts like a maniac from time to time. And this is why “Good Spirits I Bid You” my love, because you deserve the best and although I may not be it from time to time, I promise that I’ll give you my best in being a supportive partner, a good friend and faithful wife.*
*And note that by alluding faith, I not only promise my mind and body to you, but my spirit as well. I’ll be by your side and hold your hands until the good spirits abide with you and you feel peace in each and every way
